2018-01-21

Ten Mistakes I wish haven't done in my 20s


If I could turn and spin the wheel of time to fix it at Orbit level, there are so many things that would have been done differently. I don't regret reckless mistakes but seriously hope there was a guide to gently show me things. The 20s was such an era of confusion and a rigid mind which obsessed over things. I wish there was a hit, pause, rewind and stop button where fear would be put to rest. I have always been an overthinker to a rigid level that made me lose focus. It was never about me but the world and at the end, I lost myself to the crowd.


1. Chucking out the fear that ruled my life whether it's dating, going for a harmless fling and adventure spree to experiment life in all its various forms.


2. Pumped iron. I hardly exercised in my 20s and was ruled by fear and laziness when it came to fitness.  It surely took a toll when I reached my 30s.


3. Standing up to people and questioning the rules of society more often. Status quo can gnaw and kill your own self.


4. Believe in my dreams and work my ass to make things happen, whether it's my passion to make it in movies or walking the tightrope. I didn't push myself harder.


5. Take a risk and plunge in asking this super hot girl out. So what, I was turned down and faced rejection? There is so much fun and learning in being shown the door. At least, I should have tried and failed which I did but not enough.


6. Stop worrying about being broke or the lack of money. It shouldn't have dampened my spirit to experiment and living life fully.


7. Stand up more for the self, ideologies, and values. There is a certain passionate pleasure and courage to defend one's own opinion on various things. I didn't take a stand for things that I believe in on several occasions.


8. Travelled more to explore the world, meet new people and educate myself.


9. Listening to the heart more often. I have always followed the heart but didn't experiment with life like I should to chuck out self-doubts raging within.

10.  I never questioned myself or assessed the impulsive decisions that I took or for that matter, never banged on the door hard enough. I did ignore the voice of reason who advised me not to go for a Master in Economics since I already hold a Bachelor degree. Since I am interested in cinema, the main thing was to go for Mass Comm. Rupali, my classmate gave me this advice which I never listened to. Today, I am into journalism and regret not listening to her. But, it's never too late and this is what I plan to do.

2018-01-19

Half empty glass and longing for the destination

Unrequited dreams,
half empty glass,
longing for the destination,
love,
unsung battles,
carving new memories,
happiness slathered on the veins,
hope for one lost soul,
waging war within,
flutter of branches,
breaking the silence,
a miasma of cluttered thoughts,
feeling caught in the storm,
choking one's emotions,
craving for the release,
breakaway,
an inner voice shouted,
like the jilted lover.
ain't no magnificent child,
not destiny's favorite,
joined the army of alienated,
denied of love and pleasure,
 swimming among sharks,
no bruise can hurt my soul,
quenching the thirst in the vast sea,
unfulfilled prose.

With love
Vishal

2018-01-17

L-word




Love,

simply woven word,

right in the tapestry of thoughts,

encircling the universe,

fragmentation of feelings,

over abused,

faking it,

albeit reducing to nothingness,

L-word,

is what we need,

spinning strength and emotional balance,

loving like there is no tomorrow,

plagued by uncertainty,

pain reflects the harbinger of hope,

too real,

forsake everything we have,

in its name,

be real,

they often tell,

narrating tales of angst and pain,

firm up in the chasm of real emotions,

 driving us to the path of belief,

feel it inside.

Vishal
 

2018-01-14

Lost in the crowd




Sinful coffee grains,

Mindless pleasure,

Segueing into illusory world,

Sensual love,

Silly bantering,

amorous escapades,

Squabble,

a phone call which never happened,

allegory to the days,

rebellious times,

love during partition,

colonizing the brain,

whacking it to death,

intensity is personal,

no pleasure worth dying,

trudge the endless hill,

tiring foot,

breath-taking adventure,

watching the vast ocean and expanse from the ridge,

too afraid to jump,

and conquer fears,

lost in the cloud,

demons are in the imagination,

so is electricity spurted in the blood,

longing for unlimited intimate feeling,

some call it sex,

for others, momentary pleasures belied in the cloud.

Love
Vishal
 

2018-01-03

Of New Year resolutions!


http://www.questchat.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/questjan3.jpg
Image credit: Google



Meshed up in hangover mode, spicy kebab, chicken rolls, biryani and flavor of alcohol steam still rolling into the senses. The party is not over yet. The year ringleted into your senses like the worn out engagement ring and a new calendar replacing the decayed like the super expensive branded denim sitting straight on your un-toned body. Resolutions are made and curled fresh in the mind to achieve targets as if you woke up as superman or superwoman.

Like relationships and love, R for resolutions is made and broken in no time. Can you keep the fresh promises made? It's too early to break them for our over-optimistic minds are claiming victory. Right from breaking the belly to cutting smoke, clinching money deals, getting married or dating this sexy siren, or writing this book you've been striving for a decade, resolution starts high on the mind like the red bull to push into action that goes kaput in no time. You haven’t even noticed your listed objectives splintering into tiny pieces.
Blame it on hyper journalism bearing the imprint of Arnab Goswami shouting on Republic TV on the whys we must trust the 56-inch chest to bring Vikas into our lives. The R-word is so dreaded that I have stopped trusting my super duper positive instincts to make all dreams or objectives come true in the calendar year. It's better I sleep like minion and cover my head with a blanket. Time to stop going hoarse for the decade that flitted seeming like a year and an emotional chasm that I’d opt to bang my head on the wall instead of making deep, dark promises.


I shall wail like I always on the lack of money or that chick who broke my heart or groin in the hot summer. Trust me, gulp Bisleri water to calm down the spirit and soothe the nerves. You could still down an Old Monk. What a calendar change? For your kind information, I still haven't got a diary to pen my agenda for days and weeks. As it is, a long time for us to reach the graveyard end of December.




You see Sir, I am slowly mastering the art to prevaricate when some random motivational speaker asking me about listing targets. I feign ignorance and play dumb, at times donning SRK's avatar in Darr, 'Rrr...resolution...what's that'. The enthusiastic speaker lets me wallow in self-pity and now you see how I get away with crime.

The dreaded R is made to be broken and my common sense urges me on the whys of going into the mode of too much hard work to see all of them flying out of the window by the end of January. Just chill, let me plonk my body on the beach with a book, make stupid jokes on social media, turn into a troll and enjoy my scotch.

There is logic in it. Every day, I fucking stare at the empty draft of my book to be published this year, that year, yes this year pakka, forever traveling in my mind to Dharamshala, Paris, Egypt, Istanbul, New York and everywhere. You name it, you get. Every nanosecond, I am making crores stashed in the bank of my grey cell.

Just chuck out the silly R and drown all of them in the Arabian sea and make paper boats with your list which you can play in the monsoon. Now, let me eat and enjoy my drink for I am already high with your boring resolutions.


Happy resolutions
Vishal

2018-01-01

Cocktail on blank pages




Bundle of blank papers,

inked with joy, heart break, love, disappointment,and excitement,

Some call it a book,

open diary expressing inner thoughts,

salacious confessions,

chain of words,

an encounter with the world,

expressions,

emotions,

what the papers hold,

a future foretold,

buried past,

one can never know,

it shall be shrouded in mystery,

forever and never,

my reflection,

a cocktail i serve,

sensually hot,

mystical,

pocked with glamour,

hope,

i give tons of them,

a matter of belief,

now make me a sensational writer.

Love

Vishal
 

2017-12-31

Happy and jolly New Year 2018




Tinkling bells,

the time to fulfil vows,

as we look back at unfulfilled promises,

worry not,

for delicacies and yummy food,

alcohol flowing,

will wipe off worries,

drenched to liquor,

hitting an emotional pang,

new vows for the season,

excitment, thrill and hope,

turn the page,

we shall,

but also past laurels and not just worries,

wink at the light,

loosen up,

the stage is no batte ground,

just fill the blank pages,

no compulsion,

laze around,

dance wildly,

remove the fear,

perhaps the only resolution,

unfetter yourself,

stop making the heavy promises,

as the clock struck midnight,

just be,

happy and jolly,

Happy New Year 2018

Love
Vishal